Dear New Yorkers, You Are Invited to...
A LIVE Auction with me and Eddie Huang in NYC on April 1st!
Please come! Free tickets! See link below…
Eddie Huang and I are hosting an auction of weird stuff on April Fool’s Day at a Dim Sum Restaurant called THE GOLDEN UNICORN. Drinks/preview of items at 7 pm, action/auction starts at 8.
I’m completely serious.
It’s for paid subscribers only, and capacity at the unicorn restaurant is limited, so it’s first come first serve. Be quick! If you’ve been waiting for the perfect moment to become a paid subscriber, it’s now. This will be fun…
Here’s some of the stuff I’m auctioning off…
My toothbrush.
A piece of vintage costume jewelry.
A signed copy of "My Year..." and an empty bottle of Infermiterol.
Ten VHS cassettes from my personal collection, starring Whoopi Goldberg, Harrison Ford, and Christian Slater.
Vintage lingerie.
I prank phone-call anyone you want.
A painting I did when I was 27.
Lunch with me April 2nd, 1 PM, at the Russian Tea Room—I’ve never been there!
Martinis for you, me, and up to two other friends at Lobby Bar at Hotel Chelsea April 2nd at 8 PM.
Two hours of writing therapy on Zoom. Mandatory submission of a short story (under 4,000 words) for feedback. To be scheduled in April or May.